Christmas Recap 08

This Christmas was pretty good. Although I was not able to eat normally and thus had to pass up the traditional Maxwell breakfast casserole and prime rib dinner, it was a good day. I got to hang out with my whole family in one place, which hasn't happened since April, I think. My niece and nephew are getting so cute. I like them a lot. We played a lot of Wii and made a lot of wii jokes. I was called wii-tarded a lot. One of my brothers got a wii-eat down. My sister-in-law told us about hitting her wii-mote against the wall. And Winnie, my brothers Wii-ton terrier was a fun target as well.

Oh, Alaska

I miss Haines. I wanna go back.

dreaming of a white christmas??

it's more like a nightmare. sure, snow is fun, but I was pretty sure that I left alaska. seattle can't handle this. and my parents won't let me take their cars out. so i'm stuck in shoreline. and playing a lot of wii. and i still feel a little sick.

so, how are things?

I think that I am going through a Quarter-Life Crisis. Well, maybe not completely, but it is really hard to quiet some of those voices saying that I should have things more figured out. Don't get me wrong, I know I'm intelligent and good-looking and all that good stuff, but with all that potential, I'm working 15 hours a week at a video store, barely paying rent (let alone eating). What am I really doing? I mean, really? But then I take a step back (when I can) and realize that I am more fulfilled by my 15 hours at the video store than I was this spring when I had a "good job" at a mortgage company. So who is to say that my definition of fulfilling is wrong? As long as I think I'm doing ok, then I am. I just sometimes wish that I was more consistent in my thinking that I'm doing what I should be. I guess that's what 3 days of laying in bed gets you... a lot of thoughts about the way things are or should be or something idealistic like that. Psh.
This pic has pretty well summed up my existence over the past couple days... or one with me on a toilet with a bucket in hand, but that's less appropriate.

pedro sucks

i'm pretty sure pedro liked mexico, because there seems to be a party in my stomach, and i wasn't invited.

oh, mexico

just got back from Mexico, where i did in fact hear james taylor sing about it, which made my day. it wasn't really all that great. i mean, i did get to hang out on the beach a bit and chill, but i went to clean out my grandpa's house of personal things, so it wasn't super fun. better in mexico than somewhere that it is only 30 degrees. so now i'm in seattle until the new year. i think one of my favorite parts of being in seattle is that i'm going to be able to see the new bond movie. there's only a few times that living in haines, and, thus, not having a theater, bothers me, but when a new 007 movie comes out, it for sure tops that list. so i'm stoked. i'm sure i'll post my review of the movie later :)

stuck in juneau

i'm dumb. i thought my flight left an hour after it actually did, so i missed my flight tonight. so i'm stuck in juneau tonight and get into seattle tomorrow and then leave for puerto vallarta tuesday morning. so i have one day less to help out in Mexico, which i'm pretty bummed about overall. LAME!! But things could be worse. I had a little bit of a rough weekend too. suffice it to say that I just acted stupidly, and some things came up that I wanted to ignore. it's probably for the best though.

almost a month...

well, four weeks anyway. it seems like i've been here for so much longer. of course, if that were true, then i would have worked a little harder on finding a second job, but whatever.
it's still so good to be here. i still have no idea what my future holds, but for right now, i totally trust that i am where i am supposed to be, and that is a great feeling. on the other hand, its only 4:00 and it's totally dark outside. that's not so cool.

Connie's, how can I help you?

So I got into Haines on Monday around noon and went over to the Summer Inn to see Lori and Ashley. After chilling for a little while there, Lori decided that we wanted something to eat. So we went to the Mountain Market, but she decided against that. So we went to Connie's (formerly Video 144). Connie greeted us upon arrival, but taking a closer look, realized that she knew me, as I had worked for her for about a week and half the last time I was in Haines. She asked me what I was doing back, and after hearing that I was in town for a while asked, "do you need a job?" Um, ok. So I had a job within two hours of my arrival in Haines. Pretty rad, huh?

mv malaspina

3 days on a boat is a long time. i'm bored. but so stoked to be hanging out in haines this time tomorrow. and for the record, i think Pedro likes the cold. that little bugger.

Pedro the Lion-hearted

As seen in my earlier post, Pedro won't die. But I'm not sure if it's Pedro or nerves that has my stomach churning a little bit. I get on a ferry in about 8 hours that will contain me for the next three days and provide infinite time to question my decision and most likely make me wanna run back to Shoreline to mommy. But forward I go. I'm excited to see what is in store for me, even though it may be difficult. I am signing a 6 month lease when I get to Haines, so if things suck, it's only 6 months. You can do anything for 6 months, right? So off I go on my next adventure. I think it's time to settle down at least for a little while.

T -4 days and counting and Pedro

I leave for Alaska in 4 days. HOLY CRAP! I'm stoked, despite the large amount of things that I need to do between now and then. In case anyone was wondering, I named the unwanted creatures living inside me "Pedro." Pedro does not like me, and I do not like Pedro. It's a hate-hate relationship. Although, I think Pedro probably likes me, he just doesn't show it very well. What a jerk.

no better title than random thoughts

1. i have a strange desire to quote air supply... but don't know why
2. i have spent 12 of the past 15 hours on my bed. no joke
3. i had cake batter ice cream yesterday. much better when consumed as just one scoop instead of 4 of 20
4. i have resorted to selling some of my instruments to make some money... it makes me cry a little
5. my back has been sore for some reason lately. possibly related to weeding at my uncles or #2
6. i leave for Haines, AK a week from today SO STOKED!!
7. i'm hungry. and my mommy loves me so she made me pumpkin bread that is all the way down stairs... to get off the bed or to not get off the bed? that is the question
8. it's my birthday tomorrow, so don't forget to say something nice to me
9. i'm tired of taking anti-biotics that have caused my existence over the past week to look something like this:

to Oregon and back

I got to hang out with my brother, sister-in-law and nephew this weekend. It was pretty rad. Super low key. I like Bend. And I really like watching my nephew run around. My family is cool.

back in Washington

just a couple pics of how i saw the country...
philly cheese steak in Philadelphia


















Original Nathan's Hot Dog in Coney Island

what happens in vermont ...

... doesn't stay in vermont

stationary

I will spend two nights in a row in the same place for the first time since I was in Boston. With any luck I might hit even six or seven in one place. Crazy. I'm back in Seattle now. It's good to be home-ish. I'm not sure where home is, but I sure do love my family and my puppy. So it's good to be here.

Here's some estimates from my trip for you...
Miles on the train ~ 3256
Miles on a bus ~ 381
Miles driven/ridden ~ 5334
Miles flown ~ 3204
Total traveled ~12175 (almost 350 per day)
States gone though ~ 38

state number 50

I went through Nebraska today. It was the 50th state that I've been in. There are a few astersiks in there... I didn't stop in Ohio or Kentucky, but I have gone through them, so they're kinda on the list. I'm pretty stoked about it. And some of the states I haven't been in for a long time... like since I was 7.
Tonight I'm in Wyoming, which may be my 4th favorite state. I like it here. But not as much as Alaska...

Charleston - Richmond - Atlanta - Driving around

So I made it to Atlanta after going to Charleston and Richmond for a bit. I loved Charleston... there's so much history there... it's a geek's paradise. I got to hang out in Richmond with my Aunt Karen and see the historical house that she is restoring, which was awesome. Then I took my final train to Atlanta... I wandered around the city and made it down to Olympic Park, where I joined an Ultimate Frisbee game. It was pretty rad.
I met up with Ashley (future roommate) in Atlanta, and now we're on our way to Seattle. Our first stop was in Mississippi, which meant that I had to go through Alabama... State number 47. Then last night, I got to hang out with my cousin, Caroline, in Tulsa and meet her in-laws. It was super cool to catch up with them. Today we we're staying in Kansas (#49). Barring major trauma, we'll be in Seattle on Thursday night (through #50 Nebraska). I'm pretty stoked.

St Louis - New Orleans - Orlando

Still all over the map. I went to St Louis where I wandered around (shocker) and happened to find the Taste of St Louis. That was a highlight. Then I caught a train to New Orleans, where I watched people after the Saints game and then went to the French Quarter and watched some people some more. It was good times. Then I flew to Orlando this morning, where I met up with Jenna and Andrew (DR interns) and went to Epcot. My feet hurt, but I sure have seen a lot of this country.

Grand Rapids - Chicago - Milwaukee

Yesterday I was hanging out in Grand Rapids, then stayed the night at a friend's parents' house in Indiana, went to Chicago for a few hours and ended up in Milwaukee hanging out. I walked a couple miles in Chicago and then 5 in Milwaukee... not bad for having a 30 pound pack on.
Today I met a couple interesting people...
Joey was on the same train as me from Indiana to Chicago. He's from Puerto Rico and, when I mentioned the Dominican Republic, got excited about how they're just an island away.
Bill went to the Brewers game with me tonight. He was a police officer in DC in the 60s when riots started being all the rage.
Homeless dude spends his summers in Texas. He thought it was amazing that you could get an amtrak pass for 30 days for just $350 and informed me that he was going to start saving up right away.
I have met a lot of interesting people on my journey, and can't even tell you how many times a day I explain what I'm doing. But everyone seems to think that it is one of the coolest things they have heard of in a while.
I think, just maybe, I'm the coolest thing since sliced bread.

AT What?

On Saturday, we (cousin Heidi and I) hiked in New Hampshire on part of the Appalachian trail. It was so rad. It was a gorgeous day and i hiked on about a mile of something that I someday hope to hike all of. Eventually. Until then, that mile will have to do for the other 2174...

My personal Mecca

So we went to Ben and Jerry's... I was pretty much giddy the whole time. Then I tried to eat the Vermonster. It's the 20 scoop ice cream sundae topped by chocolate, cookies, whipped cream, and 4 other toppings of your choice. I went for 4 scoops each of cake batter, half baked, vanilla, phish food, and triple caramel chunk. And my toppings were oreos, chocolate sprinkles, brownies, and caramel sauce. It was a little bit of heaven, until I got halfway through. Then i just felt sick.

new york - new haven - providence - boston

today was a travel day. i started this morning in brooklyn (thanks to Alissa and the radical living community) and then headed to Penn Station yet again. i decided that rather than going straight to boston, i was going to see some of Connecticut and Rhode Island, so I stopped in New Haven and walked around Yale some... nothing too exciting. Then I went to Providence, where I got lost more than once wandering around the city. At one point, I'm not sure what kind of neighborhood I was in, but I was getting yelled at from time to time, and I went at least 30 minutes without hearing someone else talk in English. So I took the bus back to where I could find myself again. Then I headed up to Boston where I also did some wandering before finally meeting up with my cousin, Heidi. Tomorrow we're off to my personal Mecca... the Ben and Jerry's factory.

my first day in new york

i got in last night. i'm staying with stefanie, who lived with my parents my freshman year. she's my host sister for life. you know those people who no matter how long it has been, it's good when you see them again... yeah.
today i went exploring. i went to costco in brooklyn and then down to coney island where i had a nathan's hot dog... mmmm...

and tonight i went to get pizza. double mmmm...
it rained all day, which sucked, but i still wandered around a ton. good times.

my time in Pennsylvania

The day before yesterday marked the end of my first roadtrip portion of my journey. I ended up in Philadelphia. I saw the Liberty Bell and other historical stuff and then I walked all over the place and ran up the stairs from Rocky. It was rad. I stayed with a friend of a friend, which worked out super well. The weather sucked the second day that I was there, so I slept forever and then ended up getting a Philly Cheese Steak and then going grocery shopping. Pretty random, but rad none-the-less.

I left Philly yesterday on the bus up to Allentown (ish) and am hanging out with Andrew and Jenna, a couple people who I spent part of the summer with in the Dominican Republic. I like hanging out with friends.
On a crappy note, my camera broke a little, so I don't have any pictures to updates... I'll do what I can when I can... Over and Out for now.

my roadtrippin' days...

i went to san antonio on thursday night, and got to hang out there for a bit.
friday we drove to little rock
saturday (yesterday) we drove to chattanooga and got to hang out with a couple of dr interns from this summer. it was AMAZING.
today we went from Chattanooga to DC via West Virginia and the Shenadoah National Park. rad.
more later.

my last night in seattle for a while...

there's a hope in the day... nothing exciting much going on... just connecting with friends between my two adventures... but there's a hope in the day. maybe it's because i'm headed somewhere unknown, or maybe it's because i think i'm headed back somewhere known after i get back from somewhere unknown. but even the known is unknown, because who knows who may have changed.
by the time i hopefully get back to alaska (in time to vote november 4) it will have been a year since i moved away from there. is that enough time, or am i pushing things? i believe the answer to that is that enough time has passed, but only God can know that for sure. but there's a hope in the day.

My Next Destination

I am headed out to the East Coast on Thursday. I'm pretty stoked. I'm just killing time until then.
In other news, my Grandpa moved back to Seattle(ish). I haven't lived in the same state as him since I was 5. It's weird. He's dying, so that adds a little complexity to things, but it's a good thing overall.

My week with my fam

I spent the whole week down on the Oregon coast with my mom. Scott, Alissa, and Owen were there for the first part, and my dad was there for most of it, minus a short trip to Mexico.
The weather was pretty bad, but we had a good time doing puzzles and watching the olympics in the condo. For the Maxwell opinion on NBCs coverage, click here.


Me and Owen

Oregon Sunset

my sick cat... part 2

he died. the day before i got home from the dr, my mom took him to the vet and didn't take him home. he was a good cat. if only he had been able to fight off the AIDS a little longer...

my family

i'm hanging out on the oregon coast with my family. my brother and sister-in-law are here and my mom, but right now my dad is on his way to mexico to visit my sickly grandfather who is apparently dying. it's good to just hang out with the family for a bit though. my nephew is soooo fun, and i got to hang out with my niece before i left for oregon on saturday. she's getting big. i like my fam.

my journey home

i am sitting in the airport in santo domingo waiting for the first leg of my flight home. it is sw weird to think that just two months ago i was starting my journey down to the dr.
saying goodbye was hard and good. i know that God is continuing to do amazing things here, but selfishly it's hard to not be a part of that anymore.
now on to the next step.... whatever that may be.

my dominican softball game

we had our last softball experience... it was pretty good, but it was also a little intense. the two villages that we had playing each other dont like each other much, so there was a little added stakes to what should have been a relaxing game. no actual fights broke out, but i think we did come close. this was the first of the last things... things really are coming to an end. sad.

my last normal week here

Tomorrow starts the beginning of the end of my trip. This week is the last normal one that we have of tutoring and english classes. It weirds me out a little that in less than two weeks I will be back in Seattle...
The health is fine as long as long as I avoid super oily food... that does not sit so well...
On a different note, it is freaking hot here. I think it is well over 100 most days, and the electricity is hit or miss, so sometimes there is just no cooling down. That makes me ready to be back in Alaska... you can always put more clothes on... you can only take so many clothes off before it is inappropriate.

my improving health

i am feeling a lot better these days. i am fairly certain that i am amoeba and parasite free and i feel loads better. i am on a special no oil diet, so the cooks make a special kate plate and my family makes food special for me, but it has helped a ton, as my stomach seemed to be reacting violently to the food here.

anyway, i cant believe i will be in the states again in three weeks. it seems like i just got here.

my hospital visit

so, i went to the hospital for a few days. they call it a clinic, but i had an iv and nurses came to check on me in my hospital-style bed, so i'm going to call it a hospital. i had a bad reaction to my parasite medicine. i feel better now, but health is still a bit of an issue for me...

my parasite

the amoeba is gone, but i have a parasite now... dang.

my somach update

still feel a little sick... but in theory the amoeba should be gone. i can see my
heartbeat in my stomach, and i'm pretty sure that's not good or normal, but what can ya do? i just need to make it another month until i get back to the states so i can go to a doctor that speaks the same language as me.
and oh yeah, the phlegm is back too, which kinda sucks.
in other news, my hermanos and i have almost finished mario 64. it's pretty rad. we had a lot of time to play yesterday because my hermano broke his leg. it got caught in a concho wheel. (see previous post for pic) he's pretty upbeat about it though.

My stomach

i have an amoeba. its name is carolina mala. i dont think thats healthy. so im going to get rid of it by taking some killer drug things. i wrote a song for my amoeba too. im going to try to post a video of it later

my mode of transportation

this is pretty much the norm here... its amazing.
were not supposed to touch the drivers, so im holding onto the bar on the back of the bike and kinda holding up my friend jenna...

my growing patience

we havent started doing anything tangible yet. all we have been doing is planning. it can get a little old. so much of me just wants to get out there and start doing something. i guess thats kinda the way i live my life. i dont always stop to think and plan before i start something. so im probably growing or something...
and my keyboard doesnt have punctuation. it kills me.
this is a pic of my host brother. he cracks me up. i tell him hes crazy and he says, no, im just happy. i taught him to make a fist and say word up, but he cant pronounce it very well. its amazing.

Mi primero semana

My family is rad. My padre is the coach of the major league prep team here in Barahona. Whenever I walk in he says, "Hello" with a lot of emphasis on the o. It makes me happy. My madre works at the sugarcane factory and is studying to be a lawyer and I have two hermanos that like to play video games and seem to like it when I play with them.
I am loving it down here. Aside from the freaky hotness of it, anyway. We have been doing a lot of planning this week and we are going to start english classes next week and tutoring the week after. The other interns are amazing. It is a little funny because of the seven of us, six are very similar in that we like to talk a lot. So far its all been good though. I am super excited to see how this summer plays out.

My arrival in the DR

I made it. So far we've just kinda gotten used to the culture and haven't done anything too exciting. I'll write more once something exciting happens. Tomorrow I get to meet my host family, which I'm pretty stoked about. It should be fun. Hard, but fun.
But don't worry, I'm not dead yet, and my stomach is no more weird than it was when I left the states.

My last night in a familiar place

Tonight was pretty fun. I got to have some crazy good food with my family and just relax for a bit. Then I got to hang out with my bible study from last year. Ellie, Anna, and I went on an adventure to find pencils for Dominicans. It didn't go very well, and Ellie had to be home relatively soon after we departed, so Anna and I plugged on... First we went to the bank so I could get some money, but I didn't have my ATM card with me. I figured that's why I have a credit card, so we continued anyway. So we went to 7-11 so I could get a last minute corn dog. I ordered my three hour old corn dog, and upon deliberating, decided that I didn't in fact want to put 82 cents on my credit card, so I handed the checker my dog and said, "hang on, I bet I can find a dollar in my car." (since it was my mom's car, this was no problem) So Anna and I continued. We made it into Top Food, and I found one of the things that I had been looking for: chalk. Although, still no cheap pencils, which bummed me out a little. And we also got some Go Diego Go yogurt drink, which was amazing. So we continued on. I let Anna decide which way to go at each light, and we ended up down in U Village. Since there is a 24 hour Starbucks down there, and I had a little bit left on a s-bucks card, I decided that we were going to go in. I got a scone, and upon giving my card to the barista-type, was informed that I still owed her 85 cents. Now, as we have already established, I didn't want to put a charge for that amount on my card, so I found myself asking the barista, "can I borrow a dollar from your tip jar? I have some money in my car, I'll leave my scone here, and I'll be right back..." Cheesy, yes, but I sure did enjoy my scone, and had a good laugh about the fact that I borrowed a dollar from a tip jar.

My mommy

... is amazing,
but she doesn't feel good, and that makes me sad. apparently she's going to have to deal with spells of vertigo for the rest of her life. sad.

My sick cat...

His name is Bagheera. He has AIDS. Don't laugh too hard. I'm serious.

naturally, our first thoughts went to how promiscuous our cat was being... but then we remembered that he had no parts to be promiscuous with.
then our thoughts went to how we noticed he was so addicted to cat nip, and wondered if that had spread to other, more dangerous drugs. we were thinking that maybe he started sharing needles with other neighborhood kitties. we do live close to the ghetto... but that's just ridiculous.
then, we remembered that our cat is a bad-ass and fought a lot of neighborhood cats. so we think that there was some accidental shared blood...
and i must admit, it is a little funny.

My countdown and youth

T - 13 days and counting
I am so stoked to go to the Dominican. And I leave soon. Yeah.
Today I went to a bridal shower for someone I went to high school with. It was weird. So many of my high school friends are getting married this summer. It's spooky. We're so young? Why are they in such a big hurry to start the rest of their lives? (note: i think part (read: most) of the answer to this is sex) But I'm gonna hang out and play for a while. And I'm gonna dig it. Different strokes though. Someday I wanna settle down, but there's a lot I want to do before I wanna get anywhere near that.
I just went back over and read my old blogs and I think it's interesting that from the time I showed up in Haines I knew things weren't right. And it's kinda cool that I wanted to come back to Seattle because I kinda knew that it would help the healing process, and it has a lot.

my nose

is really, really burnt. it burned last week from the car wash, and then this weekend it burned really bad again because i was out kayaking the san juans. but this weekend was amazing. my friend jamie and i ferried out to lopez island on friday and spent the night at a little state park. then saturday morning we packed up the kayaks and headed out toward shaw island. after giving jamie a few quick lessons on paddling, we kayaked around shaw and decided that we wanted some ice cream, so we went to friday harbor. upon our arrival in friday harbor, we saw san juan brewing company, so we also stopped for a beer. :) then we headed back across san juan channel (not a super easy task) and camped on shaw island. so that day was roughly 15 miles. then sunday we got up and kayaked back to lopez where the car was and headed back to the mainland. it was pretty dang rad. a little intense for jamies first real time kayaking and my first time out on the open water, but it was amazing.

My farmer's tan

yeah, you know you're jealous. i took this with my computer, so the contrast isn't very good, but trust me, i burnt my arm real bad until about 4 inches from my shoulder.

My Memorial Day Weekend

What did I do this weekend? A lot of nothing. It was beautiful. A little car wash, a little movie watching, a little kayaking... but overall it was a super relaxing weekend. Not quite over yet, but still. It's weird that I'm going to the DR so soonish. I know that I still have almost four weeks, but that's still a fairly short amount of time. I guess with all the relaxing I did a bit of thinking this weekend about the DR and after I get back and what things I'm doing when I get back and whether I should go to Alaska or not and all kinds of other stuff. I also thought a lot about forgiveness and stuff (big surprise), and how I'm continually called to forgive time after time. Not easy. Here's the quote (from The Bait of Satan by John Bevere) that I read that stung the most...

"Jesus eliminates any gray areas for judges. In fact, he says that our attitude is to be so far removed from avenging ourselves that we are willing to open ourselves to the possibility of being taken advantage of again."

That's part of the reason why I have been thinking a lot about what is next after the DR. Am I far enough removed from the idea of avenging myself that I could move back to Haines, knowing that there is a possibility that I will be treated poorly by some people? Just one of the questions that has been going through my mind lately.

My latest non-report

Things have been pretty steady as she goes lately. Just working and hanging out with friends.
I went to see Prince Caspian last night for the midnight showing. It was good with one added plot line that made me scream at the end of the movie. Literally, I yelled, "nooooooooo" just before the flick ended and caused many people around me to kinda chuckle. Aside from that, it was really good.
I'm getting pretty stoked for the DR. I leave five weeks from today, so it's getting close. And I thought today was hot...

My Past...

>confuses me
>has been a path to who I am
>had/has a purpose
>is something I need to dwell on less
>isn't so bad

My Future...

~is up in the air
~makes me wonder
~has endless possibilities
~makes me excited
~scares me a little
~is known by someone bigger than me
~holds a few surprises
~will be amazing

My Life...

-is pretty good
-is short
-confuses me
-makes me smile
-makes me cry
-makes me hungry
-has some crazy twists
-is a reminder i'm small
-rocks my socks off
-is a blessing
-is like a box of chocolates
-is unknown
-makes this world better
-could go anywhere in the near future
-is dang good

My Version... Wha Happa?

Ok, so I've been giving a lot of thought to this whole, "what happened in Alaska?" thing. As for details, it's all just a blur, but here's the brief overview...
I went up there to make a positive impact on the people around me. I saw a change in the kids that go to camp, and I wanted to be a part of helping them maintain that throughout the year. I went up there as a part of a ministry that was the brainchild of one of my best friends, Amy. She was the dreamer and visionary I was the planner and more detail-oriented one. It should have worked out super well. But, as two people, we had our differences. And somehow, rather than work through those differences, we let ourselves become bigger than we are. It became a sort of me vs. her thing. We each kinda expected people to take sides, loosing sight of the fact that we're on the same side. (not "we were" on the same side, but "we are"...) We focused more on the ways that our views differed than on what we wanted to see get done. Rather than focusing on the positive change in the Kingdom of God that made her so passionate and that I got fired up to be a part of, we focused on ourselves and we scrutinized everything that was wrong with the friendship. In a nutshell, we lost sight of what mattered. Rather than loving the Lord our God with all our heart and soul and mind and strength and loving our neighbor as ourselves (Matt 22:37), we fought. We did not keep our eyes on Jesus, the author and perfecter of our faith (Heb 12:2). We let ourselves become bigger than the God that we were (and still are) called to serve. We did not bear with each other and forgive whatever grievances you had against one another. And we definitely did not forgive as the Lord forgave us (Col 3:13). It's sad that things are in the place they are right now. I was about to say it's sad that it ended up this way, but the end is not yet here. I don't know what things will look like in a day or a week, let alone a year or longer, but the end is not yet upon us. God is still very active in Haines and in whatever the heck happened between me and Amy. He continues to bring healing to me, and I can only hope and pray that he is doing the same for Amy.
Although I haven't talked to her, so I can't say for sure, I am almost positive that Amy and I still want to see the same things happen in Haines. We want to see kids be affected by a week at camp away from their problems. We want to see those kids have a support system in place for when they get back from camp. We want to see Rainbow Glacier Camp grow and expand. I hope someday we can.
That's the best that I can articulate it now. Maybe in another few months I will have a different take on things or be able to say it more concisely, but for now, that's all I got. I'm excited to see how God continues to work in me.

My Puppy... Tikka

Did I mention we got a puppy? I pretend that she's mine, but she's really my parents'. This pic is the day after we got her (two weeks ago). Note that she is far too small to make it up the one normal sized step...

My Niece, Calla

My favorite niece. She was born on Sunday, and this picture was taken on Monday, so she's real fresh.

My Nephew, Owen

Here's a pic of one of the two cutest kids I've seen... He's is just over 9 months old.

My Amazing Weekend...

I got to hang out with my brother, sis-in-law and nephew, and then my other bro and sis-in law had a baby girl last night!! So rad!!

Things will be good when...

Life is... good. I'm stoked for where things are going, but lately I feel like I've been looking forward too much and not living in the moment enough. Sometimes I feel like I've checked out and I'm just coasting until June when I can head to the Dominican. But I have been living that way for a long time. I constantly have these goals that I say, "life will be good when..." Right now, my thought is "life will be good when I can head down to the DR." But I'm tired of just waiting and coasting. By doing that I miss out on a lot of satisfaction that could be found along the way. So, I'm going to work on living in the moment and not focusing on the past or future. Not a small order, but I've gotta give it a shot.

Check one off the list...

On my list of things to do in my lifetime, seeing the Northern Lights was pretty dang high up there... But on luckily enough there was a solar storm about a week ago, and as a result, the lights were out Wednesday night. SO BEAUTIFUL!
I think it was really good for me to go to Haines. Right now I'm hanging out at the waffle house in Juneau, which is a must on any layover in Juneau that is longer than 4 hours. This fits the bill nicely. I like waffles. I'll be sure to write more on my experience in Haines later.

Maxwell House North!!!

It's so good to be back in Haines. I love it here. It makes me even more sad that I had to leave, but I still know that I made the right choice in leaving and, more importantly, in staying gone. Things have been really good since being back. Sure, there have been some awkward conversations and interactions, but overall, it's been totally normal. I haven't seen some people, which I think is a slight attempt on their part to not make a scene, which is fine by me. I've done just about everything here that I wanted to do, which has been really good, and I've gotten to reconnect with a lot of people and get a lot of closure, which is pretty much what I came here to do. If I get a better internet connection, I'll post some crazy cool pics (this one is painfully slow).

Day In, Day Out

It very much seems that I have settled into a routine here. I work 40 hoursish a week, I hang out with people in the evenings, and I try to live up the weekend a little before Monday hits again. Things aren't bad though. It feels good to have settled in a little. Sure, I wish that it wasn't here in Seattle that I was settled, but the settled feeling is good none-the-less. Work is alright. I'm learning a lot, which is good. I still don't want to have a desk job for the rest of my life, but for now it's fine. I am glad that it's just for a finite amount of time. Right now I'm trying to convince my boss that most of what I do in the office can be done from elsewhere... that way I can work for him still after I get back from the DR, wherever that may be (which is still ideally Alaska). I really don't have much to report.... Although I have been Craigslist shopping a lot lately, so maybe I'll have some fun news on something that I buy... that'd be cool. Until next time, over and out.

The DR for reals this time...

Alright, so I'm going to the Dominican Republic for summer. I leave June 20 and get back sometime around August 15. I'm pretty stoked. I'm going to the same place that I've been three times before, and I get to hang out with some really cool peeps, a few of whom I know and am pretty stoked to chill with for the summer.
I get to go see my sponsored kid, who I met before, but I don't think that she knows who I am, so I'm pretty excited to meet her again.
I'm pretty sure that it'll be really good for me to spend the summer somewhere I love, especially since I won't be able to spend the summer in the other place I love. It will be good to not just be distracted, but to be fully immersed in serving God in another culture. I love the DR.
On a somewhat side note, I'm going to try to sell some pics to raise some of the money that I need for the trip. The pics are mostly somewhere on my blog, but I've got some other good ones too. So if you want a really good looking picture, just let me know.
YAY FOR THE DR!!!

Dominican Republic, Here I Come!!!

Just found out toady that I'm officially going to the DR for the summer... I'm pretty stoked, and will expand on that thought later...

Just Because...

Sure, I don't really have much of anything to report on... I didn't get a haircut, I'm not recently back from Australia, I'm not going anywhere cool sometime soon, and although my job could be a lot worse, I'm not a fan of the 9-5.
But that's not to say that things aren't good. Life has been good lately. I have been celebrating Wednesdays. I have been doing my best to enjoy the weekend.
This weekend was pretty rad. Yesterday Chaco and I drove around the mountainsish. You may ask yourself "Self, what the heck does Kate mean by 'the mountainsish?'" Well, we drove to Granite Falls, where we were going to hike, but there was too much snow and too many people, so we just drove around. We managed to see both ends of a looped road that was closed in the middle for the season, we saw a crazy beautiful scene by a river, we chatted with some fly fishermen, and we drove through Darrington just for the heck of it. The weather was beautiful.
So, for now I'm living a fairly predictable existence (which drives me crazy), with a weekend jaunt or two, but that will pass, so bring it on.

A couple pics

So, I was going through my pics, and I figured I'd put these up there. I took them as an eagle was flying at me and landing. It was pretty rad.

Why am I here?

So, I decided that today I was going to take the day and just spend some QT with the Jeez. Lately I have been reading this book called "Changes that Heal." Cheesy title, yes, but it's still a good book. Today what I read was about taking responsibility for myself. I have been blaming the way things have gone recently for me on anyone but me. "Other people have been telling me to stay away from Haines." "Other people have told me what I should do." But I have a choice in it. I don't necessarily have to listen to what they are telling me.
So what I'm doing now, I'm doing for me. I'm living in Seattle because if I was in Haines I would be too tempted to get close to relationships that tell me what I should be doing. I'm living with my parents, not because I can't make it on my own, but because I will likely never have as good of a chance to save up money like this. I'm working at a job that I don't love because I am trying to make it a happier place to be and because I'm learning a lot about myself by being there... for example, I have no desire to have a desk job. I'm going to do something out there this summer because it wouldn't be good for me to be in Haines and because I can. I want to make the most of this time of my life when nothing is holding me back. So I'm gonna take a roadtrip to the Ben and Jerry's factory. I'm gonna go see Graceland and the world's biggest ball of yarn. I'm going to soak my feet in the Pacific Ocean, the Caribbean, the Atlantic Ocean, the Great Lakes, and a variety of bodies of water between all those.
For the next couple months, my life will have a bit of a routine to it. Work 35-40 hours a week, chill on the weekends, hang out with friends. But after that, your guess is as good as mine. Why the heck not?
I'm gonna steal the words of Jewel's new song... For a while "I'm gonna love myself / More than anyone else / Believe in me / Even if someone can't see / The stronger woman in me / I'm gonna be my own best friend / Stick with me till the end / Won't lose myself again / never, no / Cause theres a stronger woman / a stronger woman in me"
And for the record, some day I'm going to borrow lyrics from songs that Annie Parsons writes. Cuz someday, they're going to be all over the radio.

Random decision

I decided that I'm either going to the Caribbean for the summer, or I'm going to buy a Vespa and drive across the country. I'm pretty stoked about it. How cool would that be? I'd be like Harry and Lloyd...

POS

So, I bought a car this weekend, but was informed by my mechanic that it is, in fact, a complete piece of crap and should commence the disposal process asap. sad. On the bright side, it was only $220...

What do I do with my days?

That's a question I have been getting a fair amount lately, so I'll go ahead and answer it. I work at Federal Mortgage, the same place that I worked at through some of college. It's a pretty good job and I'm learning about the mortgage business, so that's pretty cool. Other than that, I have been catching up on movies and tv, an endeavor that will never really be complete. I have also been known to critically assess Drew Carey as the new host of the Price is Right and complain about it to some of the people who are close to me... or anyone who I think will listen.
I spent a good portion of today filling out my application for Children of the Nations to go down to the Dominican Republic, so hopefully I'll be able to head down there for a couple months in the summer.
If you asked me six months ago where I would be in six months, what I am actually doing is no where near the answer that I would have given you, but things are good anyway. I've kinda turned into a bit of an optimist, which is a little weird, but I like it.

Not in Seattle

Well, I'm not in Seattle right now, but I'm not in Alaska either. I decided to give myself a break from life and come to the Bay Area to hang out with my Godparents and their family. So I roamed around San Francisco yesterday and today I'm hanging out in Walnut Creek. I sat for a while yesterday at Pier 39 and wondered about what I should do with my summer. Should I go to the Dominican Republic? Should I go to Greece? Or should I just wander around the US stopping wherever I know people? Which one would I regret not doing the most. Not necessarily which one would I like to do the most, but which one would I look back on and just think, "If only I had done that..." So, I think about the future but try to not let it consume my thoughts. I'm still trying to take things one day at a time. Easier said than done in some cases, but I sure as hell am growing because of it. So, life is good. Not because anything has happened to make it a better day, but because nothing has happened to make it a bad day. Things could be a lot worse.
And on the Haines front, it looks like I'm not going back for a while... like until the fall or so. It makes me sad, but it'll be good too.
oh, and check this out... hilarious!

At least people in Seattle are happy

So far, as a result of my decision to stay, I have been out to dinner at Daniel's Broiler and I have been able to partake in a bottle of Dom Perignon Champage. Can anyone say James Bond's favorite? It's nice to know that people around these parts are glad that I'm sticking around...
Now if only things would just find some stability in these parts...

Or not....

Plans change... and I don't entirely know what is going on. I'm not going back to Haines just yet. Not for at least a few weeks anyway. I'm not ready to go back and face the way things are and all that goes along with that in Haines. I still need to work on me a little bit. I feel like I have grown a ton over the past few months. I have nothing to prove in going back. I'm not going to show that I haven't done anything wrong or to try to convince people up there that I am right and that anything else is wrong. I'll go back when I feel more ready to go back. I don't know when that will be. I feel like I finally have just let God have the crap... mostly. I know that I'm still holding on to some of it, but I'm letting go. So, I'll go back when I feel like God has made me ready enough to do that. Who am I to say when that will be? I'm excited again. I'm excited to see where God will take me and when He will take me there. But I'm not in a rush.